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Leaving the emptiness behind.
THE BILL SGRO STORY
I craved mt father’s love but in my father’s eyes i could do nothing right. When I was about eight years old my father told me, in a fit of rage, that he wished I was never born. Something in my heart went hard that day. He would discipline me with beatings and curse words. I just thought that I was a bad kid and that I was no good. But that day I made a decision that I would not cry when he beat me ever again no matter how much it hurt.
I have no memories of ever sitting on my father’s knee or him telling me ‘I love you’. But the opposite was true of my beautiful mother who is only 4′ 9″ tall. She would say she loved me and that I was special and give me lots of hugs and kisses. Many of my parents’ arguments were over me. He would lash out at her when she protected me. At school I did not do well and at report time I would get more beatings for not doing well and wasting his money on school fees for me.
I became a very angry young man and no one else was ever going to treat me as my father did and get away with it. I was always in trouble fighting with the other kids for calling me names. New Australians were not treated well in those early days of European immigration. They called us woggs, spaghetti munchers, all sorts of names to get us angry, but soon realised that it was a mistake to treat me like that. I had a hate inside me they did not know about and they soon realise it was a painful mistake calling me those names.
I was told by a teacher its best if I leave school and work on the family farm with my father. The thought of leaving school was like heaven but the thought of working with my father was like hell. I did it for a year or so and I don’t know how we did not kill each other. As I got older I would stand up to him and one day I nearly hit him, and he said, ‘if you are going to hit me you better do a good job, because if I get up, I will kill you.’.
I learned a good lesson that day. Because I left the family farm and went to work at the local slaughterhouse and at this place I really had to learn how to fight. This was no school yard where the teacher stepped in to stop us. It was out the back and only one person came back in while the other one licked his wounds. I would hit them till they didn’t get back up.
I was always the first one to come back in because I was so angry, and they were in big trouble to fight me. When I was 18 years old I left my home town and vowed I would never live at home with my father again no matter how tough life got.
I had 16 jobs from the age of 14 to v26 years old i was a man with a real problem and heading for trouble. I could not handle authority from people I did not respect. At 5′ 2″ tall I would fight with guys 6′ plus and leave them on the ground bleeding. I’m not saying I did not get hurt. I have had broken ribs and black eyes, but they were in worse shape. When you don’t care if you live or die the other person is in big trouble. Thinking about the future one time I thought I am either going to get killed or kill someone and spend the rest of my life in prison. Not a pleasant thought.
One night a friend and I had to get out of town and we took off around the ocean road, slept in the car and the next morning my friend said he wanted to visit his mum who lived in that direction. And he said you can meet my sister. I said I have met your sister. He said not this one, my other sister hardly goes anywhere. I said how old is she and he said she is sixteen. I said what are we waiting for. Lets go and visit your mum. Long story short, I met that girl and we married on December 30th 1978. This year makes 44 years. We have a 41 year old son, twin boys at 40 years, another son who died at birth 36 years ago, and a daughter at 35 years.
I settled into married life for a year or so, but life easily becomes unsettled if things aren’t right. I had an emptiness that could not be filled. I was drinking and we struggled and the money was never enough. Meanwhile I had started a part time business selling cleaning products from home, as working for a boss was never going to work for me.
The people we joined and partnered with really tried to help us get started and make it work. They were so helpful, but I had grown to trust no-one but myself. But I knew there was something special about these people, but I didn’t know what it was. They respected us for who we were, and we became friends.
One day this friend was to pick me up to go to a meeting and he was late. His Dad had had a stroke and he prayed the Lord would take him home as he knew in his heart ‘I will see him again’. The love this man had for his father was real, and when he said that, it was like a knife was stuck in my heart, as I have no love for my father. And I told him I wished I had this type of love for my father that he has.
He said what about your heavenly Father, you know He loves you. I knew what he was talking about as I grew up in a catholic family and went to church as a boy, and to a catholic school. But I had lost connection with the God he was talking about a long time ago, and to me I felt way too small for this God to notice. However, he invited me to attend his church as he said we have a group from Texas coming as special visitors. I agreed to go, only because I respect him and trust him. And I knew there was something special about this man Doug and his wife Pam.
We did go to their church. I had a big mistrust for churches. They only wanted your money! So, on the way I said to Joy ‘give me the money’ because I knew they’d get it from her, but they would never get it from me. And I also told her ‘We will sit at the back so we could get out first’. But when we walked in the place was packed, and someone took the kids to story time up the front and found two seats for us right in the middle…we were trapped.
After some singing a married man with a tie got up and talked about God like he knew him personally. This was strange to me as I only knew about priests with a collar around their necks backwards, and they seemed to only repeat words out of a book we called a missile, not the Bible. The Bible to me was just a history book. When he read a story from the Bible it sounded so real and interesting.
On our way out a pastor shook my hand and wanted to talk to me a little bit. He quickly established that I came from a farming background and so had he. He asked if he could come around one night and talk. I said that would be good. Because I actually, deep down, wanted to talk to someone about this thing called life, but I didn’t know who.
When this pastor did visit us we sat there and talked for what seemed like hours. I wanted to know the truth about life, but he didn’t bring it up, I did. I began to share about this emptiness I had inside me all my life, that I could not fill with anything. Nothing in life could bring lasting happiness. He said that God made us in His image and that we are like Him, but He gave us the gift of choice and free will, and we can choose Him to be part of our lives or reject Him. He then went on to say this emptiness I was feeling could be gone tonight, forever. I could not believe that. He asked if I would like to say a prayer and invite Jesus into my heart. I said NO I wouldn’t. He turned to Joy and said would you like to say that prayer? She said Yes I would. I said ‘What’? She said ‘Yes I would’.
Well, I said, since we met we have done everything together and so I said I will do it too. (I thought if this is some sort of a joke he can laugh at both of us when he leaves, and not just me). He said would you like to close your eyes and bow your head. So I did.
He began to say that Jesus came down from heaven to die for us because we are all sinners and need to be saved. I was thinking as he spoke, I didn’t do anything wrong. The people I beat up deserved it for they hurt me first, and I was feeling like a fool saying this prayer. And started thinking of my friends at the pub. If they could see me now, being sucked into some religious stuff.
And then I heard a voice. It wasn’t the pastor who was already talking and not Joy my wife, but a firm voice with authority that got my attention immediately. It said ‘IF YOU DO NOT TAKE THIS SERIOUSLY YOU WILL NEVER PASS THIS WAY AGAIN’.
I stopped in my tracks. I began to focus on every word this pastor was saying in this sinner’s prayer, and thinking at the same time (this could be it and knowing as well, this was it) this could be what I have been searching for all of my life. I knew there and then I would never be the same again. When we finished the prayer the pastor asked me if I felt anything, and I said NO. I didn’t want him to know that this was something I did not understand and could not explain it. But I did feel something apart from what I heard. I felt like I had come home, such peace and contentment. I felt like I had hopped up on Jesus’ knee that night and Jesus put His big arm around me and I have never gotten off that knee. I’m still there in the Spirit.
The Love I felt from that day sitting on Jesus’ knee has taken away all the pain of the past. I cannot, even if I try really hard, remember that feeling of emptiness that I had to live with all my life. Jesus completely took it away. I developed a love for all people that day knowing I have something that every person on earth wants and needs, and I want to help them find it, because Jesus helped me find it, through another beautiful person. The Bible says ‘how beautiful are the feet of those that bring the Good news. And how shall they preach unless they are sent?. As it is written ‘How beautiful are the feet of those who preach the gospel of peace, who bring glad tidings of good things?’. Romans 10:15 NKJV https://bible.com/bible/114/rom.10.15.NKJV
From that day on Jesus has been taking stuff out and put His life back in. The first thing Jesus did was clean up my filthy tongue. The pastor that led us to the Lord began to visit us every week for one year and disciple us. This was an amazing time of growth and understanding. He gave us a Bible and I could not put it down. Every word was like life to me and I needed it. We began to go to church and meet other Christians. We were blessed to be in an active church that had weekend family camps and family fun times. Our children also learned along with us and one by one dedicated their life to Jesus.
A friend from church, Charles, was involved in a men’s group called ‘Full Gospel Business Men’s Fellowship International’. (FGBMFI) and invited Joy and I to what they called an outreach dinner. We became regulars at these dinners, and I began witnessing to many people in the workplace and used the dinners to bring them into the Kingdom. There was always a guest speaker who would share testimony and give an opportunity to invite people to know Jesus as their Lord and Saviour.
As time went on, i became a chapter member, then an office holder in that chapter, then chapter Vice President. Then I became a Regional Director, and later was invited to join the national board. When the National Vice President resigned I was invited to be the National Vice President and held that position for two years until the National President’s role came up and the board voted me in as National President. I held the role of Australian National President for 12 years.
During this time I was invited to attend the Asian Pacific Business Council Business Forums, formed from 23 FGB countries at that time. On this trip I met Papa Khoo from Singapore who also was the one that invited Australia to join with them to assist in strengthening our relationships.
The Singapore fellowship, known as the ‘Gatekeepers’, at that time led by Georgie Lee and Papa Khoo, was instrumental in establishing what became known as MDM (Making Disciples in the Marketplace) program that revolutionised the way members understood their role in the Kingdom of God on earth. Later this turned into MDN, Making Disciples of all Nations. I, along with over 100 Australian members attended many of these training trips. I attended five in all.
Due to family commitments that we wanted to be a part of, the Lord raised up a new Australian leader that made transition very smooth and George Perry became the Australian President and enjoyed a similar relationship with our Singapore friends, who had become more like brothers to me. Since stepping back from this very active lifestyle of the FGB, I’m now more involved in holding small group discipling meetings in my home and in a public space during the week. Really enjoying the discipling training I was so blessed to receive and now pass on to others.
There is so much to do as we head into the end time ministry we are called to be part of. In giving hope, encouragement, and the opportunity to pass on the gift of salvation in Jesus to whoever wants to listen and accept the salvation message. A good friend in the Fellowship, Dinko Miosovich sent me a link to an Andrew Wommack ministry teaching on Divine Healing, which Joy and I can testify is powerful and real if you believe it and us the authority Jesus has given us to appropriate it into our lives. Trough the ministry of Andrew Wommack from Texas we have grown so much in this area. Eternity is a long time and so we need to witness for Jesus to those that do not know Him before time runs out.
New King James Version – Romans 10:9
If you confess with your mouth the Lord Jesus and believe in your heart that God has raised Him from the dead, you will be saved.
Receive Jesus as your Saviour. Choosing to receive Jesus Christ as your Lord and Saviour is the most important decision you’ll ever make!
God’s Word promises ‘If thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised Him from the dead, thou shalt be saved. For with the heart man believes to righteousness; and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation. For whosoever shall call on the name of the Lord shall be saved. Romans 10:9-10, 13.
By His grace God has already done everything to provide salvation. Your part is simply to believe and to receive.
Pray our loud: Jesus, I confess that you are my Lord and Saviour. I believe in my heart that God raised You from the dead. By faith in Your Word I receive salvation now. Thank You for saving me.
The very moment you commit your life to Jesus Christ, the truth of His Word instantly comes to pass in your spirit. Now that you’re born again, there’s a brand new you!
Receive the Holy Spirit. As His child, your loving heavenly Father wants to give you the supernatural power you need to live this new life. For everyone that asks receives; he that seeks, finds. ‘To him that knocks it will be opened. … If you know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more shall your heavenly Father
Give the Holy Spirit to them that as Him?’ Luke 11:10, 13
All you have to do is ask, believe, and receive! Pray:
Father, I recognise my need for your power to live this new life. Please fill me with Your Holy Spirit. By faith I receive it right now!
Thank You for baptising me, Holy Spirit! You are welcome in my life.
Congratulations! You are now filled with God’s supernatural power. Some syllables from a language you don’t recognise may rise up from your heart to your mouth. (1 Corinthians 14:14-19) As you speak them out loud by faith you’re releasing God’s power from within and building yourself up in the Spirit. You can do this whenever and wherever you like. It doesn’t really matter whether you felt anything or not when you prayed to receive the Lord and His Spirit. If you believed in your heart that you received, then God’s Word promises that you did.
‘Therefore I say unto you: whatsoever things you desire, when you pray, believe that you receive them, and you shall have them.’ Mark 11:24
God always honours His Word. Believe it! Blessings.
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That is the Bill Sgro story. I have known Bill and Joy for a long time, and they are both very committed Christian people. They give of themselves to help other people from many different walks of life in many different ways.
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